The ‘you are not alone’ feeling

‘What is the worst of woes that wait on age? What stamps the wrinkle deeper on the brow? To view each loved one blotted from life’s page, And be alone on earth, as I am now.’  Lord Byron

If you want to create legacy, and you have a clear legacy goal, you have to get used to being alone, at least some of the time. It’s just the way it goes.

 The trick, however, is to not feel like you are the only person going through what you are going through. I call it the ‘you are not alone’ feeling, i.e. the feeling that somewhere in this world, there is at least one other person who is going through something similar. Or even better, went through something similar and came out victorious.

 What the other person went through does not have to be the exact same thing as you. Indeed, the story of someone who went through something worse can give you an even stronger ‘you are not alone’ feeling.

 Here is why it is important to create the ‘you are not alone’ feeling for yourself: because this feeling makes it less likely for you to give up on your legacy goal. If you think that someone else went through a similar or worse situation and succeeded in achieving their legacy goal, you are more likely to want to stick to yours. Whereas if you feel alone in working towards your goal, you will start to question why you are working towards it in the first place, and asking this kind of question when the temptation to give up is strong is never a good thing.

 So whenever things get tough in reaching for your legacy goal, and you feel all alone, hunt around for stories of people who went through worse before achieving their goals. It will give you a sense of perspective and will help you keep going.

The time is now.

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Alexa Ispas

I am a social entrepreneur, blogger, and talent scout, interested in helping people who want to create legacy. I have recently completed my PhD thesis in social psychology at the University of Edinburgh, and am originally from Romania. I am writing a daily blog on creating legacy, which you can find at