You are not alone

‘It’s often just enough to be with someone. I don’t need to touch them. Not even talk. A feeling passes between you both. You’re not alone.’  Marilyn Monroe

Over the past few days, I have talked about the different phases you are likely to go through with your legacy project. Here they are again:

The legacy project honeymoon

The back-to-reality phase

Questioning the legacy project

The motivation slump

The last 100 meters

These phases are not set in stone. They are based on my experience, and the experience of other legacy creators I know. I hope reading about these phases will make you better prepared for what is to come. But there is another, much more important reason why I blogged about these phases: so that when you do encounter something similar, you realise that you are not alone in this experience. So that you find it easier to create the ‘you are not alone’ feeling for yourself.

The first time I started a legacy project, I didn’t know there would be an end to the honeymoon phase, nor indeed did I realise I had been in a honeymood phase until it was long gone. By the time I got to the motivation slump, I started thinking that the whole problem was with me, with my lack of drive, with my lack of focus etc. And the fact that I thought I was utterly alone in having such difficulties with my project compounded all the other problems I was having. I’m hoping to give you an easier ride in that respect.

Know that you are not alone, and it’s okay to question the legacy project, to feel like you don’t want to do it any more, to feel utterly demotivated etc. This is what tends to happen with long-term projects. You’re not unfocused, you’re not a loser, you’re just a normal human being. And like every human being you feel the need for some immediate gratification now and again, for human contact, for approval – all things that working on a legacy project deprives you of for a very long time. What is important is that you recognise these feelings for what they are, and keep going. You will get there in the end. And even if it feels like it right now, you are not alone.

The time is now.

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Alexa Ispas

I am a social entrepreneur, blogger, and talent scout, interested in helping people who want to create legacy. I have recently completed my PhD thesis in social psychology at the University of Edinburgh, and am originally from Romania. I am writing a daily blog on creating legacy, which you can find at